09Apr2000 #0015.html

Marilyn and Corey Grua

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Dear Paul, Melanie and Jared Wright, Bridget, Rob, Ben and Sarah, Sara, Heather and Nate Pace, Audrey, Rachel, and Matt via hardcopy,

cc: file, Tony Hafen, Pauline Nelson via mail, Sara and Des Penny, Claude and Katherine Warner, Lloyd and Luana Warner, Diane Cluff, Maxine Shirts via mail.

Welcome to "Thoughtlets." This is a weekly review of an idea, belief, thought, or words that will hopefully be of some benefit to you, my children, with an electronic copy to on-line extended family members. Any of you can ask me not to clutter your mail box at any time.

"Marilyn and Corey Grua are moving to Dallas. First an introduction, then some memories, a special supplement to last week's summary of Jared's wedding proposal to Melanie, my weekly summary of what all happened in my life this week, and then I will add my feelings about the going away party Andrea and I hosted last night.

Some of you don't know Marilyn and Corey Grua. You are missing a real treat, as any of us who do know them will tell you. Corey Grua was transferred by British Petroleum from their corporate offices in Columbus, Ohio to Houston about 10 years ago. They have three kids: Melissa, Julie, and David. David is serving a Spanish speaking mission in the Los Angeles area. Emily and her husband Kelley have two children. He will have his doctorate from the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota this fall. Melissa is working for Flemming Food in Salt Lake, looking to get Utah residence. Julie is in the Seattle area working. Julie is Roice's age, or maybe a year older. She worked for me at HyperMedia Corporation for several months, and I got to know what a special person she is. She is going to make someone an absolutely wonderful wife.

I have worked with Corey in the scout program for years. We have been on numerous campouts together. We have sat on the bank of a river at Brazos Bend State Park and philosophised and talked about the purpose of life, how the spirit works in our lives, and how to better know our savior. Corey has been the narrator for the Christmas Concert with the Epiphany Catholic choir since we started it (../9750.html, ../9850.html, ../9950.html). After he had been the High Priest Group Leader for about a year, he reorganized the leadership and called me to be one of his coucilors. I was a primary teacher when I was working in Austin at the Bureau of Economic Geology. Then after the divorce I was called to be a stake missionary, which was hard because I felt like I was a terrible person (or else why would Marti leave me), so how could I teach the gospel to others. I did, and it was good for me. It is wonderful to interact with Mike Smith, who, along with his deceased wife Edy, was one of the folks we had the opportunity to help teach, and it is wonderful to see how good the gospel has been for him. Then Corey had me called to serve with him in the High Priest Group Leadership, which calling I had for several years. It was very hard, as a divorced priesthood holder (read that `failure') to stand up in front of Stake Presidents, High Council Members, Bishops, and just plain good men and conduct a meeting. I did, and it was good for me.

Corey was both my and Marti's Home Teacher during the divorce and for a couple of years afterwards. He is my friend. He is Marti's friend. He listened to me, cried with me, supported me, taught me, and gave me opportunities to serve others and the Lord. He was there for Marti, though I don't believe she took advantage of the opportunity as I did.

Marilyn is quiet, and I did not know her as well as Corey. When Rhonda went to work for Continuum Resources I needed someone to take care of keeping up with Walden 3-D and personal finances and to handle all of the office work I generate at home. Corey was out of work by this time, and I knew they could use the money, and I needed the help. It turned into a wonderful friendship. Marilyn is a special, special lady, and she was a fountain of wisdom, a confidant, a guide, a thorn in the neck when I needed one, and a friend. Together Marilyn and Corey are about perfect. They have had significant trials in their lives, including a house fire where Marilyn risked her life to save one of her kids and was scarred for life.

Corey, like Dick Leigh (0007.html), is a democrat. With the antics of our sitting President, and the too heavy concentration of Republicans in the church, it has not been an easy time for a teacher who is concerned for the welfare of the poor, and who sincerely believes in the value of many of the government sponsored social programs. I do not belive in entitlements, and Corey and I had good and comprehensive discussions on many occassions about the advantages and disadvantages of various programs. I am a better man for having Corey help me to see another point of view.

After Corey was laid off by BP, during one of the infamous oil company reductions, he was out of work for several months. He finally got a job with a medical company down in far south Houston, like Friendswood. It was a good job, and he commuted an hour and a half each way, mostly so he and his family could stay in the Nottingham Country Ward. Then this company was purchased by another company, his job was consolidated into another job, and he found himself in an Employee Relations job he did not like at all. He was about the last one out the door when the company closed down. This time it was harder to find a job, and Corey was out of work for a long time. If my memory serves me right, it was at least 6 months, and probably closer to 12 months. Well he got a new job four weeks ago with Gulf Stream in Dallas.

Marilyn and Corey had a garage sale Friday and Saturday. They close on their house this week, and Marilyn will be moving to Dallas this weekend. Paul, they plan to drive back down for your Open House, and Melanie, they plan on coming to your wedding. For those who would like to be in contact with Corey their e-mail is grua@swbell.net. I hope each of you find one or two friends during your lifetime who are the caliber of people and as good of friends as Marilyn and Corey Grua.

Of course, I hope the number one of this type of friend is your spouse. Jared, I was a little concerned when I read your e-mail and heard words like `hot' mentioned several times, and then you referred to the fact `it's a good thing that we both like to kiss so much,' and I started to worry about what your friendship with Melanie is based on. From my experience, testostrone and estrogen are not nearly as long lasting as love. However, I know my baby Melanie, and I'm positive she has made the right choice for her. Jared, I'm looking forward to getting to know you, and learning more about your ambitions, goals, priorities, and plans. Thanks for the note, everyone else, here is Jared's thoughts about his engagement to Melanie, the special supplement to last week's words by Melanie:

`Here's the proposal story. I hope it was what you are wanting. Well, where to begin... to tell the truth I really can't remember not having Melanie in my life. I think our relationship has been different than most. Partly because our friendship and bond has been formed being apart from each other. Before Christmas I think we had seen each other a total of 20 days. It all began about 10 months ago. I was talking to my cousin Naomi on the phone, and she told me she had a really hot friend that she wanted me to go out with. I was in Utah at the time so I had to endure a few months until I got the chance to meet Mel. My cousin wasn't exaggerating at all. Mel was even hotter that I had imagined. My first immpression was that she was a really cute girl, but maybe a little snobby. But only after a few minutes of talking to her, I knew she would be a really fun person to get to know. After that weekend, I didn't want to seem too anxious, so I waited about a week before I called Mel. I had no idea what Mel thought of me at the time, but I knew I had found someone really special. We didn't see each other again until the 4th of July weekend. It didn't take us long until we were totally comfortable being around each other. Mel and I have said this to each other before... that it's a good thing that we both like to kiss so much, otherwise one of us would really be annoyed with the other. I think Sara would agree with that... she's had a few opportunities to be with me and Melanie together. Mel and I went out a few more times before I took off to school again. We decided that we would email each other every day and call each other a couple of times a week. Everyday I would look forward to reading her emails. I knew about when she would write, so there were lots of times at school when I would skip classes to go and read what she wrote me. Finally after being away at school a few months, I got to come home and spend time with her. I think we were together everyday for a month straight. During that time, we were really able to get to know each other. I found out just how much we are alike and always seem to know what the other is thinking or feeling. After lots of thinking and praying, I knew that Melanie was the person that I wanted to spend eternity with. I have to admit that everything hasn't been as perfect as it might seem, but I've never doubted whether or not Mel was the right person for me. I think even after being engaged a couple of days that Melanie was still feeling a little insecure about our relationship. Then, one night, something really simple, but overwhelming happened. We were going on a walk one night and Mel was going back into the house to get a blanket. As I watched her I thought to myself that she was everything I have ever wanted in a wife and she is perfect for me!!! I know that we still have so much to learn, but I think that I am more anxious than scared as to what the future holds for us together. Thanks for doing this, Jared'

Thank you Jared. Life isn't perfect. A key to happiness is how well we can bend with the wind, and how well we can react to the unexpected potholes in our road. Jared, you can get to know me pretty good by reading past Thoughtlets on the web. It will be harder and take longer for me to get to know you. I appreciate your willingness to share the feelings of your heart, and to let all of these other folks, many of whom you do not know, read about your deepest feelings. As a new reader of these Thoughtlets, I encourage you to give me feedback about what works, what doesn't, how I can improve my notes to those I love, and how to get yourself and others more involved in the process.

It has been a very busy week. There are some real challenges at work, which I will save for a later e-mail. Monday and Tuesday were spent getting ready for Wednesday. Monday night I gave the Family Home Evening lesson. I used some PAIRS material, and Mike and Janet Smith and their kids joined us for the first time in several months. After the lesson I talked at some length with Mike and Janet. Janet says I should change professions and become a counselor. Interesting thought. Tuesday night I was late getting home, and Andrea had already left for Relief Society by the time I got to the house. Oh well!

Wednesday morning it rained cats and dogs. Andrea backed the car under the car port for me so I wouldn't get my suit soaked. Thanks. At 7:00 we started a collaboration session with London as a demo for the GSH Westside Technical Breakfast. Despite the hurricane type gale outside, we had about 40 folks show up. It was truly a fascinating demo, because the questions were all as if the demo was not a fantasy, and was a real project review. We gave some private demos of the Big Hill Salt Dome and the Nehring Data in South Texas to a guy from Shell Oil and a salt dome expert. At 9:00 we had a member of the Board of Directors, the President, the Vice-President, and the District Manager for a small oil company come and review our technology for use as outsourcing data mining. I see a big opportunity with them. This meeting lasted until Ed Newman from Consolidated Graphics arrived to review for the meeting with Exxon-Mobil Upstream Research at 3:00, later in the afternoon. This finished in time for me to welcome 60 folks from the University of Houston Geoscience Alumni, who also saw a Houston-London collaboration demo. This turned into one of the best demos we have ever done. The collaboration was followed up with Big Hill Salt Dome, then Rudman, then South Australia 3-D seismic, then question and answer. Had two folks ask for a job. I finished in time to go to the Exxon-Mobil Upstream Research Meeting We are selling them HyperMedia's Knowledge Backbone, and it smells to me like we are going to be successful. I got home at 6:30 and was completely wiped out. Ken Turner spoke to my Venturing Crew about a career as an artist. Because I was so tired, I was really touched by things Ken said. My position and activities in time and space, and the implications of making poor choices, can scare me. Then again, it is probably just ego which would have me compare myself with Lorenzo de' Medici, the patron who hired Michelangelo to do his most famous works.

Thursday started with the sales forecast at 7:30, a GSH Board Meeting at 10:30, the OTC (Offshore Technology Conference) 2001 planning meeting at 1:00 PM, getting a tour permit signed at the scout office, taking Tyler Camp to the grocery store to buy food for our campout at 5:30, and the Venturing Round Table at 7:00 PM. I collapsed when I got home. Friday started with several e-mails, the 9:00 Developer's Meeting followed, then my first lunch in Hungry's, the new resturant downstairs. Peter Duncan was there with a new client. I learned there is a project in Australia to mine gas hydrates, pipe them to the interior of Australia, create an oasis at several places along the pipeline where the water from melting the gas hydrates is used for irrigation and the methane is used for fuel. My kind of project. Most of the afternoon was spent in a meeting designing object selection and multiple object selection. CoRe Exchange started with a discussion of the South Teal 4-D (time lapse 3-D seisimc), 3-C (three component) seismic survey which we now have access to. Then Richard Uden talked about the new work with Rudman. I left early to get ready for the campout. Rob, you missed a good campout, which I think you would have really enjoyed.

Friday night and Saturday morning were spent with 16 youth at Ken Turner's house with a joint Priest-Laurels Art Campout. The pictures are at http://www.walden3d.com/photos/scouts/NewUlmArtCampout14-15Apr00. I think they are pretty self explanatory for those interested. It was a lot of fun, and I think the kids got a good introduction to the importance and power of good art. Ken has over 100 pieces at his house, and we also went to David Hickman's New Ulm Art Center, and to The Falls to see the art on display there. Everyone was really tired by the time we got them home at 3:00 PM.

After cleaning up from the campout, taking Rachel to and picking her up from the youth presentation by the Know Your Religion speaker, taking a brief nap, and going to the grocery store it was time for the Marilyn and Corey Grua going away party. We had no idea how many people would come. There must have been about 80 folks who stopped by to say good-bye to the Grua's. It was a touching and fun evening. I introduced the Talley's to some of my out-of-the-box books and thinking, Don Keller to the Book of Mormon word patterns, Phillip Miller to Heritage Gallery On-line, and sang three scout songs for Marilyn and Corey at 11:30 PM after everyone had left. It was a really neat evening, and many, many people asked about each of you. Wish you could have all been here.

Beth West and Michelle Staheli came to church today. It was sure good to see them. They both asked about Melanie and Sara. I told them you are both doing great. Bill Hagen and I did our best to embarrass Corey with our bubba teeth, once before sacrament meeting, once after Sunday School, and during Priesthood opening exercises. I will close my thoughts this week repeating something said about: `I hope each of you find one or two friends during your lifetime who are the caliber of people and as good of friends as Marilyn and Corey Grua.'"

I'm interested in sharing weekly a "thoughtlet" (little statements of big thoughts which mean a lot to me) with you because I know how important the written word can be. I am concerned about how easy it is to drift and forget our roots and our potential among all of distractions of daily life. To download any of these thoughtlets go to http://www.walden3d.com/thoughtlets or e-mail me at rnelson@walden3d.com.

With all my love,
Dad
(H. Roice Nelson, Jr.)

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Copyright © 2000 H. Roice Nelson, Jr.