24 July 2005 #0530.html

Independent Play

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Dear Family and Friends,

Welcome to this week's "Thoughtlet."

These words are my personal diary and a weekly review of ideas, beliefs, thoughts, or words that will hopefully be of some benefit to you: my children, my family, and my friends.

"Sunday morning, July 17th, I wrote a song for Andrea:

`C. Andrea, I love you Andrea, you are the Light and the joy Of my life 1. You often ask me "Why?" "Why do I love you?" You seem so insecure Can't you see how You fulfill me 2. You're out to prove your worth Doing things you don't need to do And yet by doing these things You make our home heaven And lift me 3. There doesn't seem to be Anything you can not do Once you put your mind to a job The only thing from completion Is the passing of time 4. I love the food you cook The way you feather our nest The way you take care of me You are the very best I could hope to have 5. If I make it back To Heavenly Father's house You and I both know It's going to be because You led the way'

As our week progressed, and as I would watch TV and work on my map of water well data in Cedar Valley, and as she would work on Roice & Sarah's, or Sarah Ellyn's, or an unassigned quilt, Andrea pointed out to me how we have reentered the independent play portion of our lives. Andrea's concept is:

  1. as babies, someone diapers us;
  2. as toddlers we enter a stage of independent play;
  3. as teenagers we stretch boundaries to earn our independence;
  4. as adults we take care of others;
  5. as our children grow we seek independence from always being there for our children;
  6. after our children leave home we reenter a stage of independent play;
  7. as oldsters, someone has to diaper us again.

My days are pretty structured now. I get up at 5:30, shave and shower by 6:00, read the paper and drink a glass of orange juice by 6:30, work on e-mail's or catching up Thoughtlets until 7:15, arrive at the Park and Ride by 7:25, arrive at the office by 8:00, talk to Jialin in China or work on Tiles until 9:30, get up and take 10 swallows of water, go back to work on Tiles until 11:30; change my shirt and pick up a towel, walk from floor 21 to the basement, then run to floor 5, then walk to floor 17, then use the handrails to walk to floor 27, then walk back down to 17, then walk back up to floor 27, then walk back down to 21, go wash my hands, eat lunch, read from Adam Smith's `The Wealth of Nations' until 12:30, work on Tiles until 2:30, get up and take 10 swallows of water, go back to work on Tiles until 5:00, ride home with the car pool by 5:35, go home, eat dinner, work on a project until Jay Leno comes on, watch the monologue and skit, go to bed, and at 5:30 AM repeat the above. I must admit it is kind of boring not having kids around to be random event generators.

On Wednesday, the 20th, there was this note from Ben:

`Subject: Hello To: 'Andrea Nelson', 'Marti Nelson', 'Paul Nelson', 'Rob Nelson', 'Roice Nelson III', 'Roice Nelson Jr.', 'Sara Ellyn', 'Audrey Waldron', 'Heather Nielson', 'Matt Nielson', 'Rachel Nielson', 'Des Penny' From: 'Ben Nelson' Date: Wed, 20 Jul 2005 11:10:36 -0700 Some of you may already know this, but I recently started a new job with The Capital Group Companies, which manages The American Funds family of mutual funds. One of the benefits of working here provides the ability for certain related people to me to purchase mutual funds without the sales charge (I realize there are "no-load" funds in the market place which provide this feature, but they invariably have much higher expenses which can significantly effect your return over the long term). If you want more information on the fund family (which I highly recommend and not just because I work here), feel free to get in touch with me or you can find information on-line. If, after doing your research, you are interested and/or these fit into your investment plans, let me know and I'll forward the necessary paperwork. Also, I do not have everyone's email, so I am hoping you can help me get this information out to everyone who may benefit and be interested. I bolded the people not included on this distribution. The following relations can participate (note - I'm only listing my side, not Sarah's): spouse Sarah child Ethan parent Roice, Marti, Andrea aunt/uncle Chuck, Sara, Des brother/sister Roice, Paul, Melanie, Sara, Rob, Heather, Audrey, Rachel, Matt grandchild N/A parent-in-law N/A spouse of child N/A niece/nephew Grant, Ella, Colby, Taylor aunt/uncle-in-law N/A cousin/cousin-in-law Bridget, Brian, Rachel brother/sister-in-law Kate, Jared, Sarah (soon anyway) godchild/godparent N/A grandparent/prandparent-in-law Robbye son/daughter-in-law N/A Hopefully I got everyone on there. Note - my understanding is that once the account is set up, it will stay exempt from the sales charge as long as it is open. Therefore, you could continue to receive the benefit even if I leave the Company at some point or you could set up an account for your child (only for neices/nephews) (they do have a 529 plan) and they can keep that benefit throughout their life. Let me know if you are interested and/or have questions. I hope everyone is doing well. Ben (Note - I do not benefit personally in any way from you investing). Ben Nelson | The Capital Group Companies | Location: BRO | Extension: 55685 Outside: 714-257-5685 | E-mail: Ben_Nelson@capgroup.com [ Mailing: 120 S. State College Blvd. Brea, CA 92821 ]'

About this same time I wrote the following to Rick Zimmerman:

`Rick, Attached are my notes from the TDR meeting I went to in Austin. I had some time waiting on some data being put together, and so I finally typed them up. I also have a copy of a handout I picked up for you in my briefcase to give you when we get together. Dick Coons called me this morning and asked if I had heard anything from you about getting together. I told him no. I would appreciate getting the confidentiality agreement you promised, and it would be nice to have the dinner or just a meeting with Dick, which you expressed interest in doing. Andrea and I will be in Utah from the 29th of July through the 5th of August. Andrea's Dad, who passed away in 1998, is being honored by BYU on Thursday the 4th of August at 2:00 PM. His research papers and notes on the history of Southern Utah are being added to the special collections library at BYU. If you have interest in seeing the Southern Utah properties, or visiting with my friends in Salt Lake about their Illinois and Western US Prospects, this would be a good opportunity. Best Regards, Roice cell: 713.542.2207'

I also received an e-mail from Albert Boulanger:

`Date: Wed, 20 Jul 2005 19:32:04 -0400 From: 'Albert Boulanger' To: 'Roger Anderson', 'Roice Nelson', 'Steve Joseph' Subject: ces-enterprise.com Dear principles of ces-enterprise, Our domain name is coming up for renewal. Should I do that? This a more general prod. Will the oil patch embrace what we envisioned for CES? I am surprised at the traction we have at Con Ed, a world class power company, and the lack of success on attempts we have had in the oil patch to gain traction in that vertical's world class. My inclination is to persist a bit more, but I would like your input. Regards Albert'

I replied to Albert on Thursday:

`Date: Thu, 21 Jul 2005 06:41:37 -0500 (CDT) From: 'Roice Nelson' Subject: Re: ces-enterprise.com To: 'Albert Boulanger', 'Roger Anderson', 'Steve Joseph' Albert, Steve, and Roger, Thanks for the note. I agree with Albert's inclination to hang in there for a while. However, I have no money I'm able or willing to put into the pot to keep the web page up. On Memorial Day Rick Zimmerman invited me out to one of his ranches. He told me he wanted me to be the "figurehead" for a new oil company, which he would put $10 million in and raise another $100 million for. A couple of weeks later I gave him a spread-sheet with 130 ranked exploration opportunities and come back-up information. He must have got cold feet, because we have only had a couple of brief conversations since then, he has never signed the confidentiality agreement he agreed to sign, and he has not returned phone calls nor e-mail's for several weeks. However, there are other similar scale opportunities in the wind in China and in Australia and in Canada and in Utah and in Houston. If one of them happens, and if it makes business sense, I would like to tie into the technologies we worked on and talked about at CES. For the last few months, since before before the meeting with Rick's and before Matt left for college and before we became empty nesters, I have told Andrea I feel like there is going to be a significant change in my job responsibilities. Time will tell whether there is any basis behind these feelings. Albert, thanks for the earth.google.com link. I love it, and have been working on some ways to help GDC use it. Sam LeRoy and I have come up with a significant breakthrough idea regarding lightening, and we need your help to follow it to a logical and hopefully very economic conclusion. Steve, I will be in Utah between July 29th and August 5th. Specifically, on August 4th at 2:00-3:00 in the DeLamar Jensen Classroom (1130) at Brigham Young University's Harold B. Lee Library's L. Tom Perry Special Collections, there will be the opening of the Morris A. Shirts Collection, followed by refreshments and a tour of the Special Collections from 3:00-5:00. Morris is Andrea's father, who passed away before we remet. Morris did a lot of research on Southern Utah, which included publishing "Saints and Sinners," a book about the Silver Reef Mine, and "A Trial Furnace," a book about the formation of the Iron Mission in Cedar City. We will be in Cedar City from Friday through Thursday morning, and in Provo until we return to Houston Friday morning. Roger, I miss you and our conversations. Glad to hear you have some traction in electricity. Figure you might enjoy the attached poster which I gave to some folks in Washington D.C. when I attended the IW-GEO (Interagency Working Group on Earth Observations) Public Workshop early in May on my way home from three weeks in China. Best Regards, Roice'

The last message I think might be worth documenting in this diary is from Ruth Henderson of the Green Trails Subdivision Homeowner's Association. She wrote:

`From: 'Ruth Henderson' Date: Wed, 20 Jul 2005 22:10:23 EDT Subject: Got hanging trees??? Hello all, I've recently gotten several calls and e-mails from our neighbors who have noticed the numerous tree branches hanging down in the streets around our neighborhood. Taller cars and other vehicles scrape their tops when they drive under the branches and it's very annoying, not to mention hurtful for both the vehicles AND THE TREES!!! An arborist has told me that the constant scraping against the vehicles can damage the trees badly - none of us want that! So PLEASE look carefully at your trees near the street (and near your neighbors' driveways!!) and trim back the branches or raise the canopy of the tree to avoid them being hit by vehicles. You don't want the liability of causing an accident, and your trees will grow better and not be damaged--everyone/everything wins! As always, thanks for being good neighbors - and feel free to pass along this note to anyone who should see it! Ruth Henderson Have a Great Day! Ruth Drinkard Henderson'

So Saturday, after mowing the lawns, I cut one of the big branches off of the tree next to the driveway. Then I spent most of the day working on entering the Cedar Valley water well data and watching Elvis Presley movies. Not as good as John Wayne, and still better than almost anything on regular TV today. Saturday evening we participated in a surprise 50th birthday party for Karen Gebauer at the Cimmeron Parkway mud building. It was a very nice evening, spent listening, playing dominos and bingo, taking digital photos (http://www.walden3d.com/photos/NottinghamCountryWard/050723_Karen_Gebauers_50th, and generally hanging out. I think another pair of words for this is independent play.

Sunday, July 24th, Kelley Minor gave one of the Sacrament Meeting Talks. She is one of my Home Teaching Families now. I was very impressed with her theme, and actually wrote 3 possible stanzas for Prime Words based on her words:

`The horse and buggy Have been replaced By airplanes that Thread the sky' `The wagon trains Have been replaced By ribbons of highways That cross the land' `Pioneers taught us faith Sacrifice with a willing heart Courage, daily hope, and Absolute trust in the Lord'

And so the week came to an end, and so on Thursday night of the next week, I finally caught up with writing these Thoughtlets. Of course, we leave in the morning for Utah, and so when we get back I will be two weeks behind again. Oh well! Maybe this writing is also a form of independent play."

Since the 38th week of 1996 I have written a weekly "Thoughtlet" (little statements of big thoughts which mean a lot to me). Until the 43rd week of 2004 I sent these out as an e-mail. They were intended to be big thoughts which mean a lot to me. Over time the process evolved into a personal diary. These notes were shared with my family because I know how important the written word can be. Concerned about how easy it is to drift and forget our roots and our potential among all of distractions of daily life, I thought this was a good way to reach those I love. It no longer feels right to send out an e-mail and "force" my kids and my family to be aware of my life and struggles. Everyone has their own life to lead, and their own struggles to work through. I will continue this effort, and will continue to make my notes publicly accessible (unless I learn of misuse by someone who finds out about them, and then will aggressively pursue a legal remedy to copyright infringement and I will put the Thoughtlets behind a password). The index to download any of these Thoughtlets is at http://www.walden3d.com/thoughtlets, or you can e-mail me with questions or requests at rnelson@walden3d.com (note if you are not on my e-mail "whitelist" you must send 2 e-mails within 24 hours of each other in order for your e-mail to not be trashed).

With all my love,
Dad
(H. Roice Nelson, Jr.)

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Copyright © 2005 H. Roice Nelson, Jr.