22October2000 #0043.html

Pay It Forward

. . .

Dear Paul and Kate, Melanie and Jared Wright, Bridget, Ben and Sarah, Sara, Heather and Nate Pace, Audrey, Rachel, and Matt via hardcopy,

cc: file, Tony Hafen, Pauline Nelson via mail, Sara and Des Penny, Claude and Katherine Warner, Lloyd and Luana Warner, Diane Cluff, Maxine Shirts via mail.

Welcome to "Thoughtlets." This is a weekly review of an idea, belief, thought, or words that will hopefully be of some benefit to you, my children, with an electronic copy to on-line extended family members. Any of you can ask me not to clutter your mail box at any time.

Andrea and I went to the movie `Pay It Forward' on Friday night. I found some tears during the utopian discussion by the social studies teacher acted by Kevin Spacey. While I agree with several reviewers that the movie was overdone, cliche, used every possible stereotype to manipulate, etc., I strongly agree with the message.

I remember first hearing a version of the message `Pay It Forward' back when I was serving in the Bishopric with Bishop Feil. Sister Sandra Johnson was the Relief Society President. She came to a Ward Council meeting very excited about a trend which was sweeping California: people were `doing random acts of kindness.' These were often little things like paying the toll for the car behind them. And it was spreading all over the country, with people feeding the hungry, providing drink to the thirsty, helping strangers, providing clothing for those without, and visiting the sick and those in prison. And these little acts were making a difference, helping folks to smile, and find some joy in this cruel world. Of course, this is the same message our Savior shared with mankind two millinium ago (see Matthew 25:31-46). And every individual and every generation needs to rediscover this eternal truth for ourselves.

For when we are in the service of our fellowmen, we are only in the service of our God. And mankind is that we might have joy, and we find true joy when we serve others. Some time ago I had a brother in my priesthood quorum come to me in desperation because his wife of many years was going to leave me, and he felt I could help him because of my `experience.' After listening to a sorid story of pornographic and other addictions I told him: (1) there is no silver bullet; and (2) there is light on the other side of the thunderstorm. After many different times talking together, and after a tremendous struggle, he once asked me, `Roice, how can I ever pay you back for what you have done for me.' I told him `just do something nice for someone else.' For a moment, I assure you, we both truly felt joy.

However, I know from personal experience that to `pay it forward' does not completely make up for the pain I feel due mistakes I know I have made, for the failure of my marriage to Marti, which will always haunt me, and for my current estrangement from Roice, Nate, and Rob. I find some comfort knowing I have not been the one to cut off relations, and have and will continue to keep an open door. Life is hard, and it takes ongoing repentance and finding forgiveness of ourselves and others to find peace. It takes coming to better know our Savior and His unconditional love. And then when we find this true and eternal joy, sharing it with our actions, deeds, and countenance. In other words, life and joy are all about being able to keep paying it forward until we meet again and know as we are known and see as we are seen (I Corintians 13:12).

This was another week of catching up. First thing Monday I followed up on a promise to call Kari Jersch at the National Geographic, based in London, about helping with a series they are doing called `Out There.' There is a slim possibility they will do one of the 26 programs on the impending obsolesence of maps. After this call I took the Power-PC in to get it fixed. I didn't get it back until Tuesday afternoon about 4:00 PM. The rest of Monday and Tuesday were spent going through boxes still stored in the bedroom. Made a lot of progress, and there is still a lot of work. Wednesday night the Venturing Crew made a digital movie in several parts (http://www.walden3d.com/photos/Scouts/001018_Digital_Movie1). The kids had fun, and I think they learned some stuff. The rest of the week was spent working on the Dynamic Oil & Gas Corporation Prospectus for the Offshore Eastern Louisiana AMI (Area of Mutual Interest). I mentioned this last week, and I am excited about how it is coming together. Sara sent me a note in which she says `Good luck with all your work stuff even though I don't know what half of it means :)' Maybe next week I will describe this effort in more detail so you all know what I am taking about. I was going to go to Austin on Friday, but Sara and Roice had a Halloween Party (he went as a Rubic's Cube and she went as a Rubic's Chain), and Jared and Melanie went to Dallas to see Ethan, Ben, and Sarah. Maybe I will make it up there in November? Friday night Andrea and I went to see the movie `Pay It Forward,' as mentioned above. It isn't a great movie, yet the message certainly resonates with me.

Yesterday I had a Stake Scout Leadership Training Seminar from 8:00 until noon. It was OK. Testimonies were great. Especially the veiled comment's by Rob's Home Teacher in Katy 2nd, Brent Weber, which because I am involved peripherially I was easily able to translate between the lines. I moved Rachel's and Matt's pictures from the digital camera CD to disk (see ../photos/Family/09_Rachel and ../photos/Family/10_Matt) and cleaned up some other stuff when I got home. Scot Krueger, his wife Mary Cole, and their children Beth (8) and Steve (4) came to dinner and spent the evening with us. We learned not to cook hamburgers on the Jenn-Air grill in the kitchen, even if it is raining. We ended up with a lot of smoke in the house. Oh well! We had a nice discussion about biotic and abiotic dynamic replenishment, structural styles, immersive environments, Hawaii volcanic flows, helicopter stories, rocks (Scott really liked my rock garden), as well as kids, family, backgrounds, etc. It was a nice evening, and when you think about it, Andrea and I were simply in a mode called pay it forward. Hope each of you often find yourselves in this same mode."

I'm interested in sharing weekly a "thoughtlet" (little statements of big thoughts which mean a lot to me) with you because I know how important the written word can be. I am concerned about how easy it is to drift and forget our roots and our potential among all of distractions of daily life. To download any of these thoughtlets go to http://www.walden3d.com/thoughtlets or e-mail me at rnelson@walden3d.com.

With all my love,
Dad
(H. Roice Nelson, Jr.)

. . .

Copyright © 2000 H. Roice Nelson, Jr.